A band that once were big now playing somewhere small, with replacement dummers and guitarists. A lineup that has changed almost entirely since 1996, and only shares a vocalist and original bassist with its 'glory years'. In some respects its The Singer & Sometime Bassist from The Mission with some friends. Including two former members of The Cult, two former members of The Sisters Of Mercy, and an unknown Nine-Inch-Nails-alike Guitarist.

Ok. Here's the cast:
Wayne Hussey plays Neil Tennant (1999 model) with a grey cardigan, big sunglasses and orange spiky hair.
Craig Adams plays Phil Jupitus with a shaved head and beer gut.
New Guitarist wishes he was Danny Lohner from Nine Inch Nails.
Scott Garret plays Blonde LA Rock God

And so, on a grim Thursday night in a dull seaside town, The Mission, seen erratically on the comeback trail, and twelve years past their Arena headlining status, plug their latest, and least adventurous recording, of their career. From set opener Evangaline - a rewrite of The Sisters Of Mercy's "First & Last & Always" complete with nonsensical lyrics - "kiss her Louis fifteen?" - to the closing covers of Depeche Mode's "Never Let Me Down Again" (which is an identical xerox of The Smashing Pumpkins equally lackadasical version) and The Stooges godlike "1969", all are hammered down into the small box of cartoon Goth that exposes harshly their limitations.

When they made major Label records, the Mission were the nearest thing to comedy Stadium Rock you could find. If you took them seriously, really you were a lost cause. All that poncing around, throwing flowers in the air, and ridiculous, meaningless lyrics could only be a comedy . Whilst musically the band were an intruiging mix of Big Rock and pofaced Goth, almost every other aspect of them, including the somewhat hilarious "Serpents Kiss" video complete with rubber bats can only be seen as, at best half-tongue in cheek.

Its like opening a time capsule. This is a band from another age, aware - but unwilling to admit - that times have moved on. And everyone here is over 25, and dressed in black. Most of the set is firmly retrospective, the rest - in some respects - an attempt to recapture those former glories. Of particular note comes the live band premiere of "Like A Child Again", the doubletime, lethargic version of "Amelia" - the only Mission song with truly brilliant lyrics - and the abortive, and therefore amusing version of "Butterfly On A Wheel", which saw the band attempt to look professional and organised, yet desceneded in self-mocking parody.

"For a minute there, we look professional didn't we?" claims Craig, before they have to start all over again. The guitarist shuts his eyes and looks like he wishes he standing a few feet away from Trent Reznor and not Wayne Hussey. And the best Mission songs there are - "Tower Of Strength" and "Deliverance" - are neglected in favour of some generally pale newer material.

I came not to damn them - for they have made some great, if somewhat flawed, records. But last night seemed sadly like someone who doesn't quite know when their time is up. Shame. Shame. Shame.

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